Saturday 9 ~ What's Love Got to Do with It?

Thanks to The Gal for hosting this meme.  I always learn something from Gal's meme questions. She sets them up so well.What's Love Got to Do with It? (1984)Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here. 
What's Love Got to Do with It is also the title of Tina Turner's film biography, which tells of Tina's escape from her abusive, controlling husband, Ike. October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Spread the word that help is available. 
1. The video was shot around New York City in spring. Kids are seen jumping rope. Were you good at jump rope? Has it ever been part of your workout routine as an adult?NO and NO and NO

2. In real life, Tina Turner played basketball for her school. Were you good at team sports?
Yes. My dad coached Little League baseball, men's softball league and a girl's softball team. We were always at the ballfield. I could run like the wind in those days with my pigtails flying. I remember him picking me up from the bleachers fast asleep and carrying me to the car. I've done my homework many times on baseball bleachers or in a dugout.
3. In the video, Tina Turner wears a little black dress topped with a denim jacket. That jacket is a fashion staple 36 years later. Do you own a denim jacket?
I do not own a denim jacket. But I know someone who owns a really cool one! Does that count?


4. Tina's first marriage, to Ike Turner, was a painful one. Her second marriage, to German music executive Erwin Bach has been far more supportive. This has been a blessing, since Tina has had serious health problems in recent years. Do you have any medical/dental appointments scheduled?
At the beginning of the pandemic in March, I broke a perfectly good crown biting into a new chocolate recipe I'd created. Too much crunch on the bottom. Do I look happy to you?? Because of the pandemic, they no longer considered this an "emergency" even though I was miserable. I had to wait months to get it fixed (thankfully did!) which started me down a whole rabbit hole of appointments for other things and on and on and on it goes. It never ends! The worst part is dealing with the precautions before you even get in the dreaded chair. I can't believe all this happened to me during a pandemic when the LAST place you want to be is in a dental chair. I. was. terrified. to. even. go. in. Breathe in...breathe out.....breathe in......breathe out....It will be over soon. I hope!
5. Tina met Erwin at Heathrow Airport in 1986. He was there to help her prepare for her London performances. They immediately liked one another, but didn't become romantically involved until months later and were surprised to find themselves falling in love. Have you ever had a romantic relationship that crept up on you?
Yes. And maybe one day I can tell that story here. But not today.

6. The Rolling Stones' Keith Richards referred to Tina as his "favorite aunt." Is there anyone who isn't a relative of yours by blood but you refer to as aunt, uncle, brother, sister, etc?
I have two best friends who are closer to me than my own family. We call each other "sister" all the time. I love these ladies dearly.
7. Former President George W. Bush is also a big Tina Turner fan, and has praised her for having "the most famous legs in show business." What do you believe is your best physical feature?
Well. At the risk of sounding braggy....maybe my hair. That sounded braggy.

8. At home, Tina often doesn't always play music or TV because she appreciates quiet as much as music. What about you? Do you enjoy quiet?
I adore quiet. But my music needs to be loud.
9. Random question: On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being "very lazy" and 10 being "very productive," what number are you?
Definitely a 10.And on a sidenote I'll tell you a story. I've been triggered, I guess, by the word lazy, which doesn't fit my lifestyle or my vocabulary.It got back to me, recently, that one of my now-former friends found out that I've been using grocery pickup since the beginning of the pandemic. Oh, the scandal! I'm diabetic. I'm careful. I'm not taking chances. Not that I should have to explain. She scoffs at social distancing rules, doesn't wear a mask and laughs at those who do, goes to crowded events like that's a bright idea, and thinks anyone who takes these precautions is a "sheeple" (whatever the hell that means). She remarked to someone that my grocery pickup habit is "just pure laziness." It didn't hurt as much as it infuriated me. Then I just felt sorry for her. How could someone I've known for years be so ignorant? So lacking in empathy and common sense? So cruel? So politically blinded?  If I ever see her again I'm going to pretend I don't know her. Because I don't.    God help us all.

Just. wear. the. mask.

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Monday Madness ~ Avoiding Turbulence

Click the logo to play along.

Monday Madness: "The Finish This Sentence"Questions

 1. My uncle once... returned from the Vietnam War. He was never the same.

 2. Never in my life have I... jumped out of an airplane. I don't like getting in airplanes either.    Why?  Because I'm afraid I'll have to jump out of an airplane. **My last plane ride was very very bumpy!! We nearly crashed into the Washington monument during a thunderstorm. ** shudder ** It was like a scene

 from one of those crash survivor movies!!

3. When I was five my parents.....were having lots of other babies. Who has oldest child syndrome? Raises hand.

 4. High school was......stressful.

 5. I will never forget to......wear my hat and pack an extra pencil skirt.

 6. Once I met 7.......cute Dwarfs in Bloggingham Forest. They were trying to get away from Snow White because they hated her high-pitched nasal voice. I started singing an aria from La Boheme and they ran away from me too. I lose more boyfriends this way.

7. There’s this boy I know... who melts my heart every.single.time.

8. Once, at a bar, I...... sat on a barstool swirling around in my pencil skirt, sipping soda water, and waiting for my date to arrive. It was our second date eight years after the first. THAT should have given me a clue. Just when I thought he wasn't going to show up, the phone rang. I hear, "My, you're looking lovely this evening," in the creepiest voice EVER and proceeded to tell me what I was wearing.  A chill ran up my spine. I looked around. No one was there, only couples dancing and dining. "Where ARE you?" I asked. Then heavy breathing, giggles (like a 12-year-old in puberty) and more stuttering nervous nonsense from Mr. Creepy on the phone. It was like a scene from one of those stalker movies!!   CLICK!  The manager escorted me safely to my car and checked out the backseat, under the car, over the car, beside the car, in the bushes, in the trunk and in the parking lot. I drove home shaking like a leaf. My best friend came over and we checked the house and property. Then the scary voicemails started. One after the other. Called the police. Changed my number.  That is what I get for going to a bar alone in a pencil skirt  (which was attached to a restaurant) .....the bar, not the skirt...oh, you know what I mean.

9. By noon, I’m ... ready for a nap.

10. Last night I ...stayed up too late. Don't call me at noon today. I'll definitely be napping.

Hush Homer...

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Saturday 9: Do You Want To Dance?

Why, yes! Yes, I do. Thanks, O Great Meme, for asking.
This week, we're inspired by the divine Miss M's plea for a definitive answer. Here are nine random "yes" or "no" questions. Naturally you're welcome to elaborate, but if you want to zip through with a Y or an N, that's fine, too.  Click HERE to play Saturday 9, hosted by The Gal Herself @ One Gal's Musings

1. Do you check your cellphone first thing in the morning?

I check it for fleas, viruses, ticks, and cellulitis (that's "inflammation of the cell" for you non-technical bloggers). 
2. Are there dirty dishes in your sink right now?Yes, but I'll wash and put them away before bed. My dishwasher is broken. It's an endless task.
3. Have you laughed yet today?Many times! It's been a hilarious day.
4. Have you written a check in the last week?Yes, to Mr. Doolittle. He mows the lawn and tidies up outside.  
5. If you met someone who shared all your strengths and weaknesses, would you like him/her?I could "like" them, but probably not romantically. I think diversity makes for interesting relationships. 
6. Is a bride ever too old to have a big wedding?Absolutely not!
7. Do you put potato chips in your sandwich to make it crunchy?No, but I read that singer Amy Grant eats potato chips right before she records a song. She said it gives her voice an edge.
8. Have you ever taken a nude photo of someone (not a baby)?No, but the day is young...... 9. On Monday, will you be playing Bud and Mimi's cool new meme, Monday Madness? I surely will. Thanks for the plug, Gal.


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Monday Mimisms ~ Meme Madness

Sometimes I like to step away from my serious side and kick up a little silliness. Let's start with a new meme in the blogosphere called Monday Madness. Aren't we all feeling just a tad bit insane these days?  Click here to play along!

1. You are at a party in a very bad mood. There is an obnoxious guest with a camera snapping pictures of everyone in sight. Do you allow the photographs or ask them to stop?

I am the photographer. I've been thrown out of more than one store for doing just that. 

I have learned my lesson. Read the sad tale here.

2. You are on your way to a formal affair and running late. You are the guest speaker at this event and everyone is waiting for you. A police officer pulls you over for speeding. Do you make up a wild excuse or truthfully tell him where you are going and try to talk your way out of the citation? Tell us your tall tale!

**batting big brown eyes** "Officer, I beg your pardon. I'm on my way to speak at the International Society of Law Enforcement Bloggers convention. They told me to bring my camera and....."Oh, so YOU'RE the crazy bookstore lady with the camera. Go on your way. There's a room full of handcuffs waiting..."

The truth will not set you free. 

3. When you drive down memory lane for the last two years of your life and look in the rear-view mirror, do you see a happy journey or a bumpy ride?

I see moments of happiness, but overall more stress than tranquility.  This is not how life should be. This is NOT OK.  I'm working on that. How? By not "working" at happiness. By learning to BE. By surrendering more often and being fully present in the moment. Just BE. Just BE! Just BE!! The only fully alive place is the here and now. 

4.  Who makes you laugh when no one else can?

       I laugh and then I get mad because he made me laugh. I wanted to wallow. Damn him! 

5. What are your superpowers?   Twirling my hair  

6. What is the last thing you memorized?  A license plate number. Don't ask.

7. Tell us something you once took that you wish you could give back?

That bookstore picture

8. The iPhone just gave birth to the next generation of phones. What would you name them? 

      The iLOVEATTENTIONGENERATION

9.  How much mystery should be in a relationship? Is it a good thing or not?

    Keep the mystery, keep the spark

10. What is your weekend blogging routine? 

      I didn't have one until recently. I like being in that groove again. Happy Monday!

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Sunday Stealing: Spooning with Dumplings

This meme was featured on the site meme-stealing site Sunday Stealing today (June 2020).  Here are my original answers from 2009 when it was written.

Welcome back to the 3rd edition of The Queen's Meme. Each week the type of meme will change; sometimes silly, sometimes serious, but always fun! Enjoy your time in the castle.
And remember, don't end up in the dungeon.

The Cooking Meme (What Is The Meaning of Thyme and Other Deep Questions) Please join us.

Contrary to popular belief, the Queen has been known to accidentally cook something edible. Although I've given the gift of food poisoning to a boyfriend or two in the past, I actually made the food you see here. Don't ask me how 'cause I could never do it again. I made up the recipe and lived to tell it. Welcome to my Kitchen of Culinary Delights! Dinner is at eight.

1. If you could put thyme in a bottle, what is the first thing that you'd like to do?

Only thyme will tell.

2. Do eggs really crack or do they merely have a nervous breakdown?

I sent mine to the laboratories of Schuster and Scheister for a thorough embryonic cell research analysis. The diagnosis was appalling! They told me that the first six in any dozen are usually crack babies - they, unfortunately, really crack. The others just go to Six-Step Programs
Who knew?!

3. Why are you whipping the butter? What did it ever do to you?

You were sent by the PETA (People For Equal Treament of Margarine and Oleo Association) weren't you?




4. Do your spoons spoon in the drawer? Have you ever noticed? And more importantly, if wooden spoons spoon do they get splinters?


**Mimi girl, you really have an overactive imagination. Maybe you should take a pill for that.** Wait wait......My spoons are special. They met on a dating site. Are they little spoons or big spoons? Size matters in the spoon world. Is this a first date? Is the drawer open or closed? Has there been an exchange of phone numbers? Is alcohol involved?! I need more information if I'm going to counsel my virgin spoons on the fine art of mating. We don't just spoon with anyone here ya know.


5. You hear: "Dumpling, my Dumpling, come hither." The candles are lit, the fondue is dipping, the Godiva is pouring, the scallions are steaming and the music is playing.....but wait, the windows are open.
Why did you close them?

I didn't want the neighbors to see me stir the dumpling.



6. Do you need a recipe to cook or are you a bohemian chef? Show us your reckless and wild side in the kitchen. Don't have one? Here's a recipe I made just for you: You will need a spatula, a whisk, a gallon of Chardonnay, a banana and a rump roast. What is the name of your dish?



Her name was Rhonda Rump. She helped me with my recipe called The Queen's Royal Truffle. After gently seasoning the beef with a Chardonnay-dipped spatula and whisking the banana into a smashed frenzy of mush - I drank the rest of the wine and asked Rhonda if I could borrow her shoes. (If I drank it first I'd pass out and never get any cookin' done ya see)

Am I wearing a cute little chef's hat too?



7. After dinner, the dishes are so dirty that the dishwasher refuses to wash them. What did they say to get in hot water? They cursed the Queen for writing this horrid meme.

8. Is your pot black? My pots are black. My pans are white. We are an interracial kitchen.

9. What is the sexiest spice or condiment in your cabinet?

What makes it so? They're all pretty scandalous but I'm partial to the Virgin Olive Oil. Is that a spice?

I soak my hair in it once a month. Seriously. Want shiny hair? It's fabulous!

10. How much crock is really in your crock pot?

You can never have enough crock when writing a blog.

My crock over-floweth.

See what I mean?

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Do Your Census Answers Count If You're Wearing a Mask??!

Today we're playing the always delightful meme Saturday 9, with your host Sam Winters. Thanks to Bud and Gal for creating and writing this weekly meme. Since we can't go to the movies right now, we'll pretend we're enjoying Gaga and Cooper's version of A Star is Born with a big bowl of popcorn. 

I will put on my usual snarky hat.

Always Remember Us This Way (2018) Unfamiliar with this week's song. Hear it here.
1) In this song, Lady Gaga sings about the Arizona sky and California gold. Have you visited many of our western states?
None of the western states. But I've seen the Bloggingham sky. Does that count?
2) She sings that she's overwhelmed and can't find the words to express herself. Do you find it easier to share your feelings verbally or in writing? 
Writing is like breathing to me....although I will say that I'm not one to hold back much of anything either way. Life's too short to suffer fools.
3) Her real name is Stefani Germanotta. She took her stage name from the Queen song, Radio Gaga. Do you have a favorite Queen song?   God Save the Queen...of course
4) Her dad is Joe Germanotta, president of GuestWifi, a company that enables hotels and restaurants to offer high-speed wifi to their customers. Do you consider yourself tech savvy?
I've been blogging for fifteen years. I think I'm on top of things. 
5) Early in her career, Lady Gaga performed songs for a children's audio book called The Portal in the Park. Tell us about the last book you finished -- did you listen to an audiobook, or read a download to an electronic device or a bound book with pages?
 I'm currently reading The Coming Plague: Newly Emerging Diseases in a World Out of Balance by Laurie Garrett It's not for the faint of heart.     
6) She prefers dogs to cats and tea to coffee.  Do you agree with her?

Persian Patticakes

Homer the Palace Dog

I don't have any pets in the real world (except for my precious Homer and Persian Patticakes here on the blog) and I love all pet peace bloggers. Virtual pets are very easy to care for. See how well-behaved she is? Homer is a different story.... Tea and coffee are a tie.
7) Back in 2015, she appeared at the Academy Awards, performing a medley to celebrate the 50th anniversary of The Sound of Music. The movie's star, Julie Andrews, graciously came onstage to thank Gaga for her showstopping performance. Whom did you most recently thank?   
The maskless Census Taker. We social distanced in the driveway. By the way, are they going to be able to tell it's really us with our masks on?? How scientific can this be? How will they know it's me without my lipstick?? Forty years from now no one will be able to trace any human beings who lived on earth. The census depends on who we are quarantined with on April 1st...which further complicates things because it's April Fool's Day.   Currently, that consists of five chickens, three exes, four ghosts, a wild raccoon and a few bushy-tailed squirrels for good measure.

Intrusive much??

8) In 2018, when this song was first released, retailer Toys R Us closed all its stores and went out of business. What's the last toy you purchased?  Toys for my grandchildren
9) Random question: How has social media made your life better?   I've formed real friendships with people on Facebook because I either knew them in "real life" or we've blogged together since the days of Noah's Ark.  We've learned to communicate in a new way. I suppose that's "better" in a neighborly internet way.  It is NOT better for my stress level. So much vitriol and political snarkiness on social media. But I think we'll come back 'round full circle to the blog door once again.  In case you haven't noticed, the world's gone a little haywire.


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