Saturday, December 27, 2008

An Unexpected Meeting


I knew one day I'd see you again.

It was odd how you did not rattle me
affect me
overshadow me
not even the slightest of sensory meltdown

I felt nothing
just coldness
amusement
pity
sad...

that I ever let you rob me of one iota of my life

And then
you touched my hand
in some familiar way
with a smirk
and a memory of long dirty fingernails
chilled
the warmth
of my smug spot of comfort
in the room of grownup me
thinking somehow I'd "remember" that touch
as if you still had that power

oh, the sliver of electricity I felt.....

so rich
so full
it was huge
reminiscent of lust
gone to spirit
orgasmically mine
all mine

and wholly pure

without the ill-begotten evil that is you
what was your name again?


alas, it was not the shock value you were after
the only shiver I felt was contempt

and the washing of my hands under hot hot water
that could forever
oh yes
forever
wash
you
away

35 comments:

Shannon H. said...

Impressive Mimi and powerful.

Akelamalu said...

Such powerful imagery Mimi.

Queen-Size funny bone said...

That was great enjoyed it immensly.

Ferd said...

It takes a lot of work, and a lot of soap, to wash some relationships away!
It sounds like you're pretty clean now! : )

Mimi Lenox said...

Shannon - Maybe the "powerful" part comes, for me, in the form of reclaiming the moment and owning it.
I think I just did that.

Mimi Lenox said...

Akelamalu - Thank you.

AngelBaby - I appreciate the thought.

Mimi Lenox said...

Queen - It is not my usual funny post, is it? Ahhhh.....layers. Thank God for hot water.

Mimi Lenox said...

Ferd - As in squeaky.

Lois Grebowski said...

I hate it when that happens...it's so discombobulating!

Travis said...

And that is how we take back control, and keep it.

Mimi Lenox said...

Lois - And can be full of freedom if you let it.

Mimi Lenox said...

Travis - Keeping it is only a handwash away, my friend.

Summer said...

Very powerful. I loved it.

Babs (Beetle) said...

Well done!

Mimi Lenox said...

Summer and Babs - Thanks for stopping by and commenting.

SjP said...

Love it! Love it! Love it!

Mimi Lenox said...

SjP - You know, women are really feeling this vibe. Empowerment. It falls to us, in many different types of relationships, in one form or another. While I hope this sort of dilemma never happens to me within a love relationship, I know that it could be construed that way as emotional victimization too for many women. And men, for that matter.
This was a childhood injury.


I hadn't seen this man (albeit briefly) in over 40 years until last week. It took hard work to get to this point over the course of my adult life. In a way, I'm glad I was able to see for myself that indeed, he holds no sway over any part of me.

It was freeing, and strangely surreal. Even more empowering to publish my thoughts.

Thanks for reading.

Don said...

I don't know the details behind what triggered this, aside from what you commented above, but I'm very glad to see that you've been able to get past it and make your life your own again. [hug]

Mimi Lenox said...

Don - Way, way past.
Thanks for the hug, my friend.
Here's one for you.

ciara said...

wow, mimi...that's all i can say. great poetry :)

Margo Moon said...

This is what I'd call the Quintessential Goodbye. Strong words, wise woman.

Mimi Lenox said...

Ciara - I don't know about the "great poetry" part but it was great therapy.

Mimi Lenox said...

and thank you, Ciara

Mimi Lenox said...

Margo - Isn't it odd how one can feel "nothing" and yet so much. Choosing what to feel is where the freedom comes in. Thank you, my friend.

Desert Songbird said...

The human psyche is a fickle, fragile thing. Some things are never washed away.

Charles Gramlich said...

Very human. Very strong. I really liked this.

Mimi Lenox said...

Songbird - Not completely, no, but I believe that their remainder gives us a choice and sometimes - a voice.

Mimi Lenox said...

Charles - Thank you, sir.

bundleocontradictions said...

WOW!

Mimi Lenox said...

Autumn - I hope you've had a great holiday, my dear.

Julie said...

**sigh**

Wanna hug?

Can I have a snowflake?

Mimi Lenox said...

Julie - Received. Thank you.

You may have as many snowflakes as you can carry in your pocket.

Starrlight said...

I completely get this. As you know =) And while we can't really wash away the memories, we can change their color, you know? I like to think mine never made it to blue since I clung so hard to the reds. Now I've mellowed. Pink I think =)

Mimi Lenox said...

Starr - Pink anger sounds just about right.

Mimi Lenox said...

Oh. And no need to go to the blue at all...

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