Monday, July 5, 2010

Monday Mimisms ~ You should be kissed, and often, and by someone who knows how

With me it’s either feast or famine. In the last few months I’ve been inundated by fabulous kissers. It occurred to me last night that this is so. And I started to wonder why. And then I thought, “Oh, shut up, Mimi. Just enjoy it.” You know I can’t do that! I'm too analytical.

And I don't mean just ordinary peck-on-the-cheek dates. I mean lovely slow sigh-inducing fog producing deep kissing kissers. Perfect gentlemen. And lovely kissers. Men who know how to really kiss a woman. Is the moon full or something? It’s a pattern I tell ya. A very very very very very good pattern. A spell. I don’t want to break it. But really. I decided to pontificate for your edification and my future romantic amusement.

Let us evaluate:
1. The infamous Parking Lot Kisser who took me on our first date to the Oyster Bar. We all know what happened there. Eh. I missed him for awhile and we bantered back and forth and then. Eh. Our humor was all off. But it was so odd the way he wanted everybody in the restaurant to watch this spectacle through the front window. Infamous!
2. The Rain Kisser (I dared him. He did.)
3. The Return of The Parking Lot Kisser
4. The Toe-Curling Kisser
5. The Couch Kisser

And to make it even more complicated, each, in his own unique way was a better kisser than the last. All but one had intriguing potential for awhile.
And all but one turned out to be complete jerks. ComPLETELY unacceptable. Except for the kissing. The kissing was good. It was very very very very good. Exceptional!

A quandary of pheromonal proportions.

Maybe I should see what they're like when the moon is not full. Just for the sake of scientific research. I know all of them must think I'm the most fickle woman on the planet. Why do I care? All but #4 were something akin to disasters in the making. And I knew it before too long when things outside the fog just didn't seem to add up. Of course, as is my usual custom, I found this out after too much kissing. Or not enough. Which is it?

What simple fun and how utterly odd that at this moment in time I would be given a plethora of prize puckerers. I couldn't help myself. I channeled Scarlett you see and when that happens my eyelashes take on a life of their own and the rest is couch kissing history.

Still. My choice was to end it before it really began. Maybe it's not possible to have it all. Maybe you can't find knee-buckling kissing and a man of integrity in the same person. Maybe I'm asking too much. I don't care how much my toes curl if their lips tell lies in between the sighs.
(That rhymed.)

What would Scarlett do?

That's what I thought.

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Lizza (your noypi friend) said...

Sorry most of them turned out to be complete jerks.


You are one heck of a lucky woman to have experienced a plethora of great kissers. (I have experienced toe-curling and phenomenally yummy kisses from just ONE man recently, but I have no complaints. :-D)


Those men are even luckier to have been on the receiving end of YOUR kisses, Mims.

Mimi Lenox said...

Lizza - I am dying to hear about your no-complaint-kisser. Write me. It's way past time for a chat.

And thank you, my noypi friend.
Hugs and love.

Akelamalu said...

I have been kissing the same man for the last 38 years and he still makes me swoon. :)

Charles Gramlich said...

Surely Jerks are not just better kissers. Could be that predators develop the tools to better prey

Mimi Lenox said...

Akelamalu - Now that's a story I love to hear told.

Mimi Lenox said...

Charles - I think you might be onto something there....

Mimi Lenox said...

P.S. I had a most amusing chat with a guy last night who was anythingbut sincere. I could see through it quite clearly. And yet he scoffed at the idea that his intentions were less than honorable. How DARE I question him about ANYthing!

Isn't it amazing how people fine -
tune and justify unscrupulous behavior to the point of being highly skilled about it?

Topic for another post.

Anonymous said...

plethora of prize puckerers...
I like that ;)

AND you're not asking too much especially if "lips tell lies in between the sighs".

good rhyme :)

Finding Pam said...

I loved that line in the movie. Rhett was so right about kissing.

I hope you used mouth wash? LO!

Red Shoes said...

I LOVED this post... the last woman I was involved with was NOT a good kisser...

What WAS I thinking?!?!? Toe-Curling kisses are the best!!!


Desert Songbird said...

I'm NOT saying this about all men, nor am I saying this is true for everyone, BUT it's been MY experience that the best kissers were ALL WRONG for ME. My husband, oddly enough, is a not-that-great kisser, but he's been the best mate for me. So. while I think toe-curling, heart-stopping, earth-shattering kisses are wonderful and oh so fabulous, the men from whom I've received them were NOT. Sad but true.

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