Meditating In The Shower

Day Four of the Mimi Makeover here in Bloggingham and I am running out of time. It's 11:00 pm and I should be asleep by now but no....what am I doing? Cooking soup. Yes. Really.

I realized time was my enemy today so I thought, Why not kill 2 birds with one stone? The recap: Exercise was good today (1 hour of power walking, 30 minute TaeBo workout and 50 situps, no weights), food intake was iffy (a ham and cheese sandwich with mayo, 2 oranges, grapes, 10 wheat thins, pineapple cottage cheese), sleep last night was terribly short, 3 water bottles (which is 3 short of my goal) and then it hit me that I wouldn't have time to do the quiet time because I'm in the middle of cooking up a stomach ache storm. And I needed a shower anyway......

Perfect place!

And aquatic.

I only realized when I started to swallow soap that I was breathing a little too deeply in there.

But back to the soup. Tonight I'm cooking a specially blended concoction known simply as The Soup Diet For Dummies. You're supposed to lose 10-17 lbs in 7 days if you stick to the plan and it acts as a "cleansing agent" for your body. The more soup you eat the more you will lose. Perfect! I only need to lose 7 lbs so this should be a piece of cake. Perfect! The recipe didn't look too difficult. Curry, parsley, veggies, bouillon, etc etc. But what do I know? I know what you're thinking. What possessed me to choose this little experiment knowing I had to cook first?

Your guess is as good as mine.

Nevertheless, here are the ingredients. This is what they looked like before I put them in the pot. My cooking is usually unrecognizable after it's done so I thought I'd better photograph the evidence in case somebody died.
You will tell the coroner, won't you? In case it's me?

Onions and pepper..... Carrots to wash and peel......

It only took me 3 hours to make a pot of soup.

But by golly instead of blogging I was unclogging (as in arteries).

Then I got stuck. "Boil ten minutes fast." Faster than what? How much faster can ten minutes be? Let's just skip that part. Recipes can be so dumb.

But no matter what I did the water would not evaporate. It is supposed to evaporate....right? ONE HOUR later it still looked the same. Soggy carrots happily boiling like mad. I tried putting it in the microwave but that didn't work either. I ended up draining the water OFF the veggies and dumping all the other ingredients in the pot. But the pot - as you can see - was too small.

Sigh.

Don't say it. This is where a little planning would have come in handy. I know. But I've been busy holding court with Billy Blanks in my living room, pretending that Dansani water bottles are filled with Chardonnay, and finding God in the shower.

I have no time to buy a pot.

After setting off the burglar alarm by dropping the can opener in the kitchen floor which caused me to run screaming through the house to shut the blasted thing off before it woke the dead which caused me to brush past the Worcestershire sauce bottle and knock it over spilling dark sticky stuff all over the floor
which caused me to naturally run right back through it to retrieve the can opener and stuck my hand in the mess which stained my new nails and in the flash of thirty seconds I start to remember why I'd rather eat Cheetos and die happy than live a long life with this healthy disaster. I can't get to bed because I'm too busy cooking real food!


I put the tomatoes, green beans, soup powder and bouillon cube in and said goodnight to the crockpot - which hasn't been used since I made chili for my ex-boyfriend's breakfast. He was not amused. Neither am I now.


Finally. Here I sit ready to turn out the lights and sleep for 7 hours just so that I can check "slept 7 hours" off my list tomorrow. And I thought this was supposed to make my life simpler? Here's the simple truth: This concoction better be good because tomorrow I can only eat the soup I made and some kiwi fruit.

What was I thinking??!

What posted on Mimi Writes one year ago today? Ten Ways To Kill A Mouse: The Saga Continues