Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Mimi On Mars: "She Sprang a Punture?"

The saga of Lonesome Cowboy Advertizer and Miss Mimi continues.

I just received a letter from cowboy. He said it took him three days to write it and wanted me to have this "pitcher of myself." I've been wondering about my cowboy man for awhile now, so I wrote and asked a few personal questions. This is what he had to say about his education, his Ma, and his past relationships..........Whaddya think? Is he a keeper?

Howdy Miss Mimi,

Bazza sez he caint seem to post a comment on your blog right now. He sez it's not you it's him but he sez that to all the women.
Ma telled me I should be careful coz if all my fantasies came true I'd run a country mile and she knows that you're my fantasy gal.
She sez "Beware of what you wish for lonesome because it might come true".

She used ta like spinich but some how, after that basketful you force-fed her shes kinda lost the notion to eat any more of it.
Well now I got to tell you that my highest level of edjacation was up on that Brokeback Mountain but I don't like to talk about it if'n you dont mind Miss Mimi.

Acourse, I did have me a girlfriend once but I couldn't keep up the payments an she got repossessed anyways she sprang a punture so the laughs on me aint it?

Now my dream would be to sit in front of a roaring log fire in a big ole easy chair with you on my lap a big Chistmas tree with a mighty big pile of presence around the tree. Then you could have someone to hear your sweet sleep talking, if that's not bein' to forward.

Bazza's a real busy boy these days but Lonesome has always got time for his Golden girl of the West.
I did ask Ma why I don't have no brothers an sisters but just clammed up on me. I'm thinkin' theres some history there.
She went reeel quite.
See you in my dreams Miss Mimi.
Lonesome Cowboy Advertiser XXX (see? kisses on the bottom)


Dearest Cowboy - Mimi would love to cozy up to the fire with you someday, even if you don't want to talk about your schooling. I promise to try and stay awake and not talk in my sleep. I feel guilty now for trying to silence your Ma with that tainted spinach salad. I just wanted you to kiss me underneath the willow tree.

And here you have sent me such a sweet letter.
I should be ashamed of myself.

I hate to hear about your ex-girlfriend's apparent possession and re-possession. Maybe you should have taken her to an exorcist. And don't worry about your Ma's quiet spell. She probably never had anymore children because you got all the brains anyway.

Thanks for writing and I hope to see you soon. I'm taking a road trip up New England way. Maybe we can find a willow tree.

Your Mimi

Now who could resist a fella like that?

Former Cowboy visitations - Will the Real Cowboy Please Stand Up?


SGT DUB said...

Mighty fine picture of him. In our parts of Oklahoma he is definitely a keeper. Hold on tight Mimi.

Mimi Lenox said...

SGT....I'll take your word for it then.

Mimi Lenox said...

Roxi is it? So nice of you to grace my blog with your lovely, uplifting comment.

Starrlight said...

I wonder if "tight" was the old fashioned reference to drunk? Would explain the rudeness!

I think he sounds cute =)

Jake said...

Will Rogers senior would say as much.

"I never met a witty cow gal I wouldn't take to the Oklahoma State Fair."

Anonymous said...

Too funny. His girlfriend got repossessed. What a crack up! You guys are just too funny!

Bond said...

Mimi...My advice is to make sure this one does not get away...
Just think of all the fun times in front of that roaring fire talking about his mama....

I guess as with any forum open to the public, the seedier side shows through.

Bazza said...

Do you know what Ma jest sed to me Miss Mimi? She sed "If you had any brains Boy, you'd stay at home with your dear Mama. Thet woman'll eat you up for breakfast an spit you out without a care!"
She won't be doin' too much talkin for a day or two. I used your great spinach trick. She sez she dont like Popeye no more.

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