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Monday, November 29, 2010

Monday Mimisms ~ I Am Quite Sure It's Not My Birthday. Quite Sure.


I am but a mere child. Still.
Never mind that the Queen's Parade was called off due to some hillbilly tradition in this godforsaken place...something about a watermelon seed spitting contest, I forget....It's bad enough that even Homer forgot my birthday. And after all the fame and fortune I've brought him. Is there no loyalty in this world?

I know it is not my birthday because Queen Elizabeth did not send me a card.
Nor did Prince William or Kate The Middleton invite me to sing at the Royal Nuptials in the Spring. Yet.
I know it is NOT my birthday because my mother hasn't called - and she should know. It has been so long since my birth that even SHE has forgotten.
I know it is not my birthday because I have yet to use hair coloring on my natural brunetteness. Not YET! I refuse to see believe that there are a few odd colored strands of unbrunetteness in my royal head.
The minute I do I will believe it is my birthday.

I know it is not my birthday because my ex- husband HAS called me apparently in a an unsuccessful effort to make up for all the years he didn't. I accepted his happy happy with a smile and a skip down happy divorce lane. Seriously. I tease him constantly about how if he doesn't shape up I'm going to divorce him.

I know it is not my birthday because I have resisted the urge to smack anybody who dares speak my real age. I feel twenty-five years old and that's how it's going to stay thank you very much.
I know it is not my birthday because I can still climb this tree.

And most importantly, I know it is not my birthday because my doe-eyed look still works on police officers.  
Trust me on that one.

What was that, Homer? What did you say? Listen you big-mouth hound dog I am in no mood for your back-talking ways on this blog. Do you hear me?? If you don't have something nice to say don't say anything at all. You think I don't know it was you who left that package of Botox on the porch this morning? Huh?
"Excuse me, My old Queen, I have to get ready to go out."
Where are you going? You can't leave me. It's my birthday!!
 "I'm sorry, but the Grand Marshal in the Spit Parade can't be late."

That dog is such a traitor.




15 comments:

Charles Gramlich said...

Happy not your birthday day.

Speedcat Hollydale said...

Have a great day you gorgeous spring chicken ....

Travis Cody said...

Happy Birthday my Queen!

Or...

Happy That Day That May Or May Not Be Your Birthday!

Patti said...

When I heard about the royal nuptials, naturally I thought of you.
I daresay you should offer Bloggingham to the cute couple for their reception. Or for her bridal shower. Or something festive!

I didn't even think of you singing for them, Your Highness. Wonderful idea!

Hope you have a sparkling birthday!

Akelamalu said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR MIMI
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOOOOOUUUUUUU!

Have a great day m'deario. x

Finding Pam said...

I use to feel 25, but now I am feeling about 35. That is great that you can still climb that tree.

Happy Birthday, Mimi,

Sherry Blue Sky said...

You can CLIMB that tree? I am so old and my neck so painful, I cant even bend my head far enough back to LOOK UP IT!! Enjoy being 25 - for as many decades as you can, hee hee!

Annelisa said...

Since it's not your birthday...

Ehhhhhh....very merry unbirthday to me
(To who?)
To me
(Oh, you)

A very merry unbirthday to you
(Who, me?)
To you
(Oh, me)

Let's all congrulate us with another cup of tea
A very merry unbirthday to youuuuuu!

Merry unbirthday Queen Bee xx

Mark In Mayenne said...

You can climb that tree? Race you to the top!

(Word verification is comantri.. come and try?)

Jean-Luc Picard said...

Happy Not Your Birthday, Mimi!

Anonymous said...

Happy Un-Birthday you.. you young, tree climbing beautiful Queen you!

Mimi Lenox said...

You all are so sweet (except Homer, he's not sweet, he's irritating..but I digress) Thank you for making my day today and letting me be silly on my birthday. It would have been nice to stay home and climb trees but I had to work....to come home to so many wishes here and on Facebook is awesome.
Thank you so much.
It's been a great un-birthday!

Durward Discussion said...

It isn't your birthday because you are celebrating another anniversary of turning 25.

Vinny "Bond" Marini said...

Heck with you

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

Mimi Lenox said...

And it's another non-birthday today all these years later. Glad to see we're all still friends.

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