Oh For the Love Of All That Is Blog Holy, Please Remove My Ning

So I get this email during my recent and ongoing recuperation from the bed of pain known as gallbladder surgery (so lovely).

I was shocked! It read,

"Dear Network Creator,
As we've mentioned on the Ning Blog (http://blog.ning.com), we're committed to improving the performance and capacity of the Ning Platform so that Network Creators can add all of the things that make their Ning Networks the exact right social network for their interests or passions, and achieve fast performance. One way we can do this is by removing Ning Networks that have never had any activity or that have been dormant.

MimiLenoxsnetwork, a Ning Network you created, has been inactive for an extended period of time. We took this network offline recently and are planning to remove it in 4 weeks (December 18th, 2009). To prevent this from happening, simply take your Ning Network online and click the link at the bottom of the page.

We hope you will take advantage of this opportunity to build and grow your Ning Network. If you would like to learn best practices or tips and tricks from successful Network Creators, please join Ning Creators. If you have any other questions, please visit our Help Center.

Thanks,
The Ning Team"

Who knew??! My response:
I do not remember, Dear Planet of The Ning, ever creating such a thing as my Ning. I would think that if I actually had a ning I would know it. That doesn't sound like the sort of thing one forgets. I can't create a decent grilled cheese toast sandwich these days, much less an entire network. Really? That was me? I CREATED a NING Network? On purpose? Really?

Looking through my files. Nope. Sorry. I can't find a single folder that says, "On the 3rd day Mimi looked and saw that it was good." I would have remembered a historical event such as online Creationism. Is that a word? But my readers have at least another week and a half of listening to me moan and groan in the Castle's Recovery Room while I'm out of work - anything is bound to happen. Creating worlds could be an option while I'm bored out of my gourd.

And really. Do you honestly think that anything with my name on it could become inACTIVE?

I own 51 blogs already. Some publish daily, others publish hourly.... with permission, without permission, cloned, confiscated, in litigation and on the verge of litigation, there's not a lazy blog among 'em. Doozies maybe, but certainly not dormant.

And still here I sit on the very prissy precipice...uh...precipice of priss....I tried so hard to misuse that alliteration... of losing my Ning.

This concerns me.

Where did I put those pills......
I asked my surgeon if he saw my NING during the gallbladder-surgery-that -was but he said "NOPE, never saw no ning, Miss Pencil Skirt. I saw a lot of other mess, but no NING."

And yet you say I did it, so I must have. I have more important things to worry about ya know than finding something you're threatening to remove on the 18th of December that I didn't know I had or needed or created in the first place. What FOR? I'm doing perfectly fine without that little green organ they just took out last week and my skin is a lovely shade less than the green it was becoming - this is NO time to mess with my complexion. I find it oddly surreal that I've spent at least the last 10 minutes of my new gallbladder-less life searching for my ning. Maybe I'm missing out. Maybe I will miss my Ning. Maybe it holds the key to the universe (maybe she's had too many pain meds today), the Holy Grail of Nings, the light at the end of the Tunnel of Ning could be the 9th wonder of the Universe for all I know. Google being the 8th you see....Maybe it's Ning to my Nang! And all God's chillin' know that Mimi needs a Nang.

Or something like that.

Alas, I'm Ningless.

I hope it wasn't tax deductible.

Signed,

Mimi Queen of The World