Thursday, April 19, 2007

Dont Hate Him Girl - Mimi Style

Twenty-thousand readers later, Smooth-Talking Sam is now the talk of the town. Thanks to a website called or DDHG, not to be confused with - one and the same - somebody's mama is wondering how her sweet innocent Sammy got his face plastered on the cyber wall. Apparently it's no secret to the rest of the world. And I do mean the WORLD, which has now seen his smiling face and heard all the dirty little details of Sam's love gone awry........and of course, it's Sam's fault.

I hate this site. I hate this concept.

Defender of free speech, I am. Do I think that people have the right to creatively and honestly express themselves? Of course! So here is Jerry Springer cyber-style; except in this forum the men aren't throwing the punches and they must endure the embarrassment of having their very personal sins made public. Posts are usually signed "anonymous" or "unhappy" or "out of touch" (no, I just threw that in) while the postERS retreat smugly into oblivion and the postEES have little to say. After all, mug shots are hard to miss, impossible to refute. And no matter how exaggerated or contorted the "facts" may be, it's OUT THERE. It's printed. It's done. Indelible.

Does anyone else find this offensive?
I do suspect the majority of these stories have a great deal of accuracy and truth, that's the sad part; but infidelity and "moral sins" cannot be attributed to one sex alone. One man's lack of kindness or even abundance of emotional cruelty does not belong solely to the male gender and could just as easily, and often is, doled out by women. In this new wave of investigative dating, individuals are judged and convicted through the eyes of fury or rejection. Pain lashes out and the cycle does not stop.

No mistake about it - I, too, have been lied to and royally dumped. Who hasn't? But never in my wildest dreams would it occur to me that I must on my duty-bound honor as a member of the "sisterhood" of scorned Sallies and Sues, post his name, address and photograph for all the world to see. The site's mission claims to have the best interest of women at heart, the assumption being that we ALL want to sing in the loud chorus of man-hating women across the world. Not so. 

If this is sisterhood, I want no part of it.

I have to wonder.
Who is the victim here? The guy whose reputation is potentially ruined by the vindictive click of a mouse or the sassy "sister" who chose to make herself a victim -yet again.

Oh please.

**Addendum: After legal action ensued, the site removed the database of men and has redirected its focus toward dating advice for women.**
copyright 2005 Mimi All Rights Reserved.


Pat Jenkins said...

thanks for sticking up for us guys. tough to stop a vengeful person true or untrue. especially a woman. jk

Vinny "Bond" Marini said...

On Firefox, the blog looks fine...

I have to tell you that I did not know of these sites, but I am shivering that they exist. No, Mimi, not because I might show up there, but because one mistake in a relationship can ruin someone's life.

Look, we are not all perfect...but if you screw up a relationship with Sue, does that mean that you and Sally wouldn't be perfect for each other?

And what happens when the female screws up? is there a site out there to put her face into the world and ruin any chance she might have of future happiness?

Mimi Lenox said...

Especially a woman?? Hmmmm.........

Vinny "Bond" Marini said...

hummm I left a comment and it came back as undeliverable

On Firefox, the blog looks fine...I have to tell you that I did not
know of these sites, but I am shivering that they exist. No, Mimi, not because I might show up there, but because one mistake in a relationship should not ruin someone's life.
This site is as bad as any racist site out there. It should be destroyed.

Mimi Lenox said...

I agree, Bond.

Lee Ann aka Dixie said...

I agree with Bond... however, I did know the existed and one time I seriously thought about adding my dead best ex to it... but I had better things to do with my time.

Bud Weiser, WTIT said...

I could not agree with you more. But be honest, did you check to see if I were on it? I did. I am not. I am not surprised. Not that I am SO great, but I ain't so bad, either.

Outstanding post.

Mr. Lance said...

how this is legal?? I did need to go back and see if I was there after reading Buds comment. kinda worried me when results started to pop up... not me!!! however, I will need all future dates to sigh a waiver!

Peace Globe on Monday...

Mimi Lenox said...

Bud - It would have been surprising to find you there.
You are wonderful.

The site is totally disgusting.

Mimi Lenox said...

Lance - There is a class action suit in play as we speak. Surely they'll out of business sooner than later. Let's hope so.

Anonymous said...

Hi Mimi-
I am Bud's favorite sister ( as you know he only has one) and I am so sorry that we did not get a chance to visit on your last trip to CT.But, I promise we will next time; Bud always saves the best for last. ;)
Words cannot describe how nice it was to read about your experiences with both of my parents. I could picture everthing you were talking about in both cases. Especially my mother insisting that she take you to the river. She's a stoic old Irishwoman , who at 83, continues to amaze me. I told her about your description of the evening, which I thought was so well written and a true compliment to her. She got such a big kick out of it. She and I went out the other night and as I was walking her into the house she became very silly and grabbed my arm and pulled me quickly to the door. Then she looked at me and said thats exactly what I did to Mimi. I could picture everything, it was fabulous. By the way, she thinks you are lovely.
Apricots with Beirne was equally as enjoyable and again I could picture the entire evening. I am sure after meeting my dad, you undertand where Bud "gets it from".
I am looking forward to spending some time with you this summer.
Thanks for writing about my folks , I will treasure the blogs forever.

Mimi Lenox said...

Diane - How nice of you to write me. Meeting your parents was truly delightful and a pleasure. They are both equally amazing!

I do look forward to meeting you in May or during the summer and getting to know you. Perhaps we can revisit The Gristmill when we're having better weather and "Mrs. McGillicutty" and I can have a good look at that waterfall - preferably in the daylight! I'm glad she took my humor in stride. She is such a classy lady and a riot!

And by the way, your brother is pretty amazing too. But you knew that.
Again, thanks for writing. Look forward to meeting you.


Unknown said...

I partly agree. I do believe it is libel and I wouldn't do it, although if it was legal I would. You would have to know the story and if I didn't have the private block on my LJ account, I'd have you read it. This type of person belongs on a warning website all by himself. He has just destroyed the life of wife #5 (and her kids). I was wife #3. I could see how people would post things on there to get back at an ex, it is tempting, but I am too afraid of litigation. I'd say don't hate the site, but rather the people who use it for vengance. What it would be good for are for men who are really 'a piece of work'. If you want to know the story, Bond can fill you in.

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