Friday, November 27, 2009

Oh For the Love Of All That Is Blog Holy, Please Remove My Ning

So I get this email during my recent and ongoing recuperation from the bed of pain known as gallbladder surgery (so lovely).
I was shocked! It read,

"Dear Network Creator,
As we've mentioned on the Ning Blog (, we're committed to improving the performance and capacity of the Ning Platform so that Network Creators can add all of the things that make their Ning Networks the exact right social network for their interests or passions, and achieve fast performance. One way we can do this is by removing Ning Networks that have never had any activity or that have been dormant.

MimiLenoxsnetwork, a Ning Network you created, has been inactive for an extended period of time. We took this network offline recently and are planning to remove it in 4 weeks (December 18th, 2009). To prevent this from happening, simply take your Ning Network online and click the link at the bottom of the page.

We hope you will take advantage of this opportunity to build and grow your Ning Network. If you would like to learn best practices or tips and tricks from successful Network Creators, please join Ning Creators. If you have any other questions, please visit our Help Center.

The Ning Team"

Who knew??! My response:
I do not remember, Dear Planet of The Ning, ever creating such a thing as my Ning. I would think that if I actually had a ning I would know it. That doesn't sound like the sort of thing one forgets. I can't create a decent grilled cheese toast sandwich these days, much less an entire network. Really? That was me? I CREATED a NING Network? On purpose? Really?

Looking through my files. Nope. Sorry. I can't find a single folder that says, "On the 3rd day Mimi looked and saw that it was good." I would have remembered a historical event such as online Creationism. Is that a word? But my readers have at least another week and a half of listening to me moan and groan in the Castle's Recovery Room while I'm out of work - anything is bound to happen. Creating worlds could be an option while I'm bored out of my gourd.
And really. Do you honestly think that anything with my name on it could become inACTIVE?
I own 51 blogs already. Some publish daily, others publish hourly.... with permission, without permission, cloned, confiscated, in litigation and on the verge of litigation, there's not a lazy blog among 'em. Doozies maybe, but certainly not dormant.

And still here I sit on the very prissy precipice...uh...precipice of priss....I tried so hard to misuse that alliteration... of losing my Ning.
This concerns me.
Where did I put those pills......
I asked my surgeon if he saw my NING during the gallbladder-surgery-that -was but he said "NOPE, never saw no ning, Miss Pencil Skirt. I saw a lot of other mess, but no NING."

And yet you say I did it, so I must have. I have more important things to worry about ya know than finding something you're threatening to remove on the 18th of December that I didn't know I had or needed or created in the first place. What FOR? I'm doing perfectly fine without that little green organ they just took out last week and my skin is a lovely shade less than the green it was becoming - this is NO time to mess with my complexion. I find it oddly surreal that I've spent at least the last 10 minutes of my new gallbladder-less life searching for my ning. Maybe I'm missing out. Maybe I will miss my Ning. Maybe it holds the key to the universe (maybe she's had too many pain meds today), the Holy Grail of Nings, the light at the end of the Tunnel of Ning could be the 9th wonder of the Universe for all I know. Google being the 8th you see....Maybe it's Ning to my Nang! And all God's chillin' know that Mimi needs a Nang.
Or something like that.
Alas, I'm Ningless.

I hope it wasn't tax deductible.

Mimi Queen of The World


Jeff B said...

A Queen without an Ning to adorn with Bling? Now that's just obscene!

Mimi Lenox said...

I couldn't agree more.

Callie Ann said...

Funny, I remember something to do with a Ning... I believe it was kind of like some of those other yaaawhoo places someof us joined back in the day and we all use to have badges on our blogs... go make in time to like 2007 or beyond... Ha Ha. NING... now there is a Bing.. I know that... I am going ning hunting.. Happy After Turkey Day

Starrlight said...

I still think Ning sounds pornographic :P

Speedcat Hollydale said...

Sooooooooooo ... no ning?

(( smile ))

Mimi Lenox said...

Callie - There is NO telling what kinds of things we joined that will come back to eventually haunt us.
Do you have a Ning too?

Mimi Lenox said...

Starr - Well, the other day it did. (smile) I'm so glad I got the chance to tell the Bees what I really meant here. I wouldn't want you guys to think I've lost my...ummm..virtue.


Mimi Lenox said...

Eric - Sadly, no.

Mojo said...

Ning? As in Lord of the Nings? Ningons? Or is this the Create Your Own Gerund Website? Like one of those places where you can dress up your avatar or something but with words. Run-Ning! Joust-Ning! Okay, that one didn't work, but you get the idea. Actually it would've worked better if they'd just called it the "Ing" network, but I think that was already taken.

Hope you're feeling better my Queen. Get well soon!

Xmichra said...

this is very interesting.. what is a Ning? what does it do? does it whirl and pop, or discolor blue? For the Ning is a thing, and a thing named for you.

heh. couldn't help myself.

Mejis said...

Ning, Bing...what is up with these weird names? What on Earth is a Ning and how can I avoid it? Sounds a bit like a disease, don't you think? "I'm sorry to inform you, but you've caught the Ning." Weird.

Finding Pam said...

To Ning or not to Ning...that is the question? Never heard of it.

I hope that you are recovering and are good as new soon.

Finding Pam said...

To Ning or not to Ning...that is the question? Never heard of it.

I hope that you are recovering and are good as new soon.

Finding Pam said...

To Ning or not to Ning...that is the question? Never heard of it.

I hope that you are recovering and are good as new soon.

Finding Pam said...

To Ning or not to Ning...that is the question? Never heard of it.

I hope that you are recovering and are good as new soon.

Mimi Lenox said...

Mojo - Thanks!

Xmichra - That was very funny!

Pam - You mean you don't have one either?

dawn said...

I got stuck at...
"I own 51 blogs already."
Holy Ning! Do you sleep? Ever?

Jean-Luc Picard said...

Now you are ningless, do you feel very different?

Mama Zen said...

You are hilarious, even without your Ning!

Happy Birthday!

Akelamalu said...

Well you're sounding better even if you are ningless! :)

Anndi said...

Today is your birthday... happy birthday to you, yeah!

A ning sounds like the kind of guy I once dated... you're better off without.

Mimi Lenox said...

Dawn - I'm a busy girl for sure.

Mimi Lenox said...

Jean-Luc - I feel awesome!

Mimi Lenox said...

Mama Zen - I'm glad to see that my Ningless state hasn't hampered the funnies. I was kinda worried about that.

Thank you for the well wishes!

Mimi Lenox said...

Akelamalu - I am feeling much better, my friend. Thank you!

Mimi Lenox said...

Anndi - Better off for sure. It does ring oddly familiar.
I like the Ningless Mim.

Mimi Lenox said...

Ok. Ok. How did you find the little bees for the cake, hmmmm????
It's awesome.
And yummy.

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