Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Strange Orange Fruit

Seven Royal Questions on Tuesdays
The Grocery Store Meme (#77)

The last time I went grocery shopping I came home with way too much chocolate. It wasn't supposed to be that way. I went for mangoes. But the chocolate kept calling my name.
Let's see what kind of trouble I can find in the grocery store today.
You can play along at The Queen's Meme, written by Yours Truly.

1. Do you make a list when you go grocery shopping?
I somehow read "Hersheys"
Don't they look the same to you?

2. Do you buy more groceries when you're hungry?
Never ever ever EVER go to the grocery store when you're hungry. You will suddenly acquire cravings for the strangest items you never ate before.
What ARE those things? I came home with 3 bags of this strange orange fruit
3. Coupons. Use 'em?
 I handed it to the cute checkout clerk but he said it was unredeemable unless I was of royal blood.
Fine day to forget my crown.

4. Have you ever complained to the manager of your grocery store?
 I asked for a raincheck for the massage.  I swear I heard him mutter "You need a braincheck" as I prissed away. 
The nerve! 

5. Do you like to buy groceries at huge chain stores like WalMart? Or do you shop exclusively at food stores?
I go to the Tire Store to buy tires.
I go to the Hair Salon to get a haircut.
I go to the Nail Salon to get a manicure.
I go to the gas station to buy gas. 
I go to the doctor when I'm sick.
WHY would I go to a Wally World to buy my FOOD?

A person like that might actually go to the grocery store to get a massage. 
I try to steer clear of those people.

6.  How much time do you spend reading labels in the grocery store?

TOO MUCH TIME. Yes. I read them. All of them.
There I stand with my magnifying specs on cause Lord knows ordinary people (not that I'm ordinary) can read a blasted thing on those labels. And that IS the point, now isn't it?
By the time you decipher the calorie and salt content your ice cream has defrosted and the milk has expired.

7. Do you push your own grocery cart to the car and return it?
No. I pull mine to the car. Don't you? Return it? Returning a grocery cart takes the same amount of time as walking to Cambodia.  I have no time for this!!!
(But seriously..I actually drive around to the front and they load my groceries in the car for me. No kidding. All you have to do is ask.)

8. What is the one food item you always buy at the grocery store that you can't live without?
See #2 above
It's my only vice.


Dawn (Twisted Sister) said...

No good can come from reading that label. I've gained more weight since I started counting calories than before I knew what a calorie was!

Stay Away From the LABELS!
Ignorance is BLISS!

Mimi Lenox said...

You do have valid points! I think you are right.
Down with soy. (just a little private joke there)

Amanda said...

This is hilarious! I agree with Dawn. The bags of "strange orange fruit" just didn't taste the same after I checked the calorie content.

Jaffer said...

I just look for the Kosher mark... That way I don't have to read labels.

Sue St Clair said...

I spend far too much time reading labels too :)

Charles Gramlich said...

I like my french fries orange and my fruits red.

Vinny "Bond" Marini said...

I was shopping for something to read and I found this

Travis Cody said...

Please tell me that you weren't serious about not having time to return the grocery cart. You know that makes me nuts.

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