Thursday, September 23, 2010

Dr. Phil, Dr. Peale and a Bit of Change

Welcome to The Queen's Meme #53 ~ The Change Meme
Norman Vincent Peale said, "Change your thoughts and you change your world." It was interesting to see how many meanings I could find for the word "change".....some are serious, some are silly. Join us!

1. Name one thing you'd like to change about yourselfThe compulsion to change my shoes at stoplights.
2. If you wave a magic wand and be done with all the small petty nuisances in your life, what would you have "be gone" first?
Alarm clocks

3. Do you collect and save your spare change in a jar?
Yes. And then Baby Boy fishes in and gets all the quarters. That child! Why did we send him to school to learn to count?

4. Change your world. What is our biggest concern as a global humanity?

Violence and poverty. That's two. But who's counting?
5. What would you have changed about your last relationship or the one you're in now?

Since I have only one foot "in" one now (maybe next weekend I'll decide if the other red heel commits I hope he isn't reading this) I should speak to my last last or my next to last or my first last? Which is it?
I really need to be more specific.

But seriously, my part (which is the only part I can control):
I would not change my intentions or my depth of commitment or my words or my actions in any of them. They were wholly true and real in all phases - during and after. I cannot change anyone else, their perceptions (real, projected or imagined), their reactions, the way they deal with hurt or their "truths"...nor would I want to....they have to figure out what was true for themselves and then they have to live with it. I have to decide if I'm going to let their emotions and how they handle them affect me and my life. The correct answer is "Are you KIDDING me??! No way." The honest and human answer is that it's not always easy.
But change? The only person I can change within a relationship and after a relationship ends is ME.
I am not a believer in trying to change anyone else.
I am a believer in paying attention.
That has been rather interesting and insightful.

6. If you could reverse the course of history in a time machine, what would you do and how do you think the world would be different today?
Let's go back to Adam and Eve. Had they been created androgynous in the first place we would have no divorce, fashion shopping would be so much easier, no one would have had to write the Mars/Venus book series (he is now divorced btw) and Dr. Phil would be out of business.

7. Who would you like to change into a toad?
Karma usually takes care of all things.

8. What is the first thing you change into when you get home from work?
Shoes OFF. Unmentionables OFF. Blogjammies and coffee pot ON.

9. If you could change places with anyone in the world for one day, who would that be?
It would save me a lot of time if I could be a fly on the wall in the final divorce court proceedings of every man I go out with. It would take the guesswork out of a second date, now wouldn't it?
10. Have you ever heard the expression "turn over a new leaf?" What is under your old one?
Worry. The new one has no worry written anywhere on it. I like it!

11. Name one thing that can cause you to immediately change your mood.
Customer service reps on the phone

12. What have you recently (or ever) had a change of heart about? And why?

Someone recently said to me, "There's a reason for everything. You'll see."
I used to believe that. Now, not so much. Sometimes the lesson you learn is that there was no lesson, there was no reason, there was no redeeming quality and there is no grand epiphany on the horizon. I think that is the hardest lesson of all. Idealism in relationships. Not so grand.

13. When is the last time you changed the oil in your car?

My dad would ask me a thousand times every year about this time, "Have you changed the oil in your car? Is there ANY oil in your car?" and then "Give me the keys to your car." He would hobble outside in his jammies and check it himself. I could tell by the way he shook his head under the hood that he was not pleased with my car maintenance abilities.
I miss that check up.

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Starrlight said...

Now now now, Mimi, idealism beats pessimism. I am a good example of that ;)

Mimi Lenox said...

You ARE a perfect example of that.
And I am thrilled for you.

Pessimism didn't even cross my mind in this post. Realism maybe, but not pessimism.
My "realism" applies to a couple of past relationships, not present, and certainly not red-shoe-worthy future ones.


Xmichra said...

awe, that last one made me sink a little :(

I am not certain about a wholey androginous walk of like though... that sounds rather boring.

Karen Wallace said...

Love your perspective!!!! Love the red shoe. I give a therapy group for women called: "Claiming your Ruby Red Slippers." Warmly, Karen

Charles Gramlich said...

Cool shoe. Looks like it might make a good weapon. :)

Sherry Blue Sky said...

I love this. Great writing, great perspective, as always!

bobbybegood1 said...

I just had to post a comment, even before actually reading your post, because I/we haven't spoken for a - to long of a while. How are you doing Queen. Ah, I absolutely love your meme. I thinks it's perfect. Will do tomorrow. I know I have said so in the past, and didn't but, I promise Mimi - God, help me - I mean it. Cheers Sweetie!!

Vinny "Bond" Marini said...

Dear Ms. Queen:

This is to inform oyu that our client will not be able to complete this meme.

You see, he is restricted from doing any memes over 10 questions.

When you decide to stop at 10, we will allow his participation.

Thank you,

Beatem, Shootem, Gagem
Attorneys At Law

dawn said...

Hmmm... where shall I begin?

#5. Extremely insightful.

#7 cracked me up.

#8. I so get that.

#13. made me sad.

oh and please don't change your shoes at stoplights... for obvious reasons ;)

Jean-Luc Picard said...

Superv answers, typically Mimi!

Jamie said...

Truly wonderful answers. With a lot of similarity to others who answered. Nice to know that someone else doesn't do shoes indoors.

coopernicus said...

now was the last last the first or second last...or was the first the third last or the second last last last?

just to be clear...

Mimi Lenox said...

Xmichra - I wouldn't like that either in reality!

Karen - Now that group sounds interesting? Do all the women want to be Cinderellas? said red. Aha!

Charles - That cracked me up. Might help with that pesky toad.

SherryDear BSG Attorneys at Law - (Does that title disturb you at all Vinny?)...
I take no prisoners in Memeville.
Learn to deal.

Yours Truly,
Mimi Queen of Memes

Dawn = #5 Extremely extremely!! And I am working on that stoplight thing.

Jean-Luc - Why thank you, Captain. Your answers were stellar!

Jamie - No shoes or unmentionables for me. I really shouldn't have mentioned it though.

Coopernicus - I wasn't clear?

Mimi Lenox said...

Bobby ala Mimi - You keep saying that but I never see a meme! Off to the dungeon with ya.

Vinny "Bond" Marini said...

Well the fact that you sent to to Sherry and my attorneys makes me queasy!

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