Thursday, February 19, 2009

A Message From Homer from the Queen



My Queen is AWOL.
She said to give you five reasons why she can't make a post tonight. She said to make 'em good if I know what's good for me. She said I'd better not hold up any of those funny signs behind her back either.



She said not to try to pull anything 'cause she'll find out when she gets back to this blog of hers. And if I tell people what she wears to bed or how long it takes to find her shoes in the morning that it'll be my last dog day on earth. She said I'd better thank my lucky blars (that's Blog + stars for all you....oh...I HATE it when she does that) that I live with royalty and not in the local blog pound.

FINALLY! I get a chance to speak.

I hate her. If you had to live with her you'd hate her too. She's soooo annoying.
She makes me sleep on the floor!

But seein's how it's rainy and windy tonight and I despise the dungeon on spooky nights, I'd better do as she asked. Last time I blabbed about the curlers she threw me in the moat and I can't swim.
Lucky for me I had my cellphone with me.

These are the reasons Miss Priss my Queen isn't blogging tonight.
You have to guess which one is true.

(I'm going to order a pizza......brb)


A. She is otherwise occupied.
B. She is tied up in the dungeon.
C. She is busy GOOGLING
D. She's getting ready for a performance.

E. The muse showed and she obeyed.
1. American Idol asked her to be the 5th judge.
2.It's been a long week and she's too tired to blog.
3. All of the above.
4. None of the above.
5. Some of the above.
I. Oh who cares

I lied through my teeth.
I really love my Queen.




Especially when she's AWOL.
Dial 1-800-
Bloggingham-Party for directions to the Castle.

I hope she likes my post.
Anchovies?



Copyright © 2006-2009 Mimi Lenox. All Rights Reserved.

38 comments:

Speedcat Hollydale said...

As a cat, it gives me great happiness to comment a dogs post.

That sounds so wrong!! But, Mimi is awol, and the dog did post. Tell me, are your paws really small ... or do you type with a paw nail?? My dog Mardy blogs, and HAS HIS OWN BLOG!!!

Ahhh yes, the animal blogs. Next thing you know cats with will be blogging.

Well, if you see Mimi tell her a sends a big kiss and am looking forward to watching American Idol with her as a judge. Simon will be so smitten!!!

Here is a bone and a chew toy from Petsmart.

wendy said...

Dear Homer the Palace Dog,

I would like you to know that I enjoyed your post (curlers, really?) and agree with you on the floor thing. I hate to sleep on the floor too ... except on Sundays in front of the fire ... that's just wonderful.
Also, could you please let your queen know that she won a hand made item from me (the people before her deferred to the next commenter) ... so if she could please send me her address ... since I really don't know exactly where Bloggingham Palace is ... that would be ever so helpful. :)

Nice to meet you Homer.

Here's a greenie for you!

Wendy
www.wendsterblog.blogspot.com

Bud Weiser, WTIT said...

Homer-
You are starting to make sense. Something's rotten in the state of Blogingham, me thinks...

Dawn (Twisted Sister) said...

Hey Homer - What time does the party start?

Anonymous said...

Has anybody seen the Queen? Maybe there's been foul play......

Mark said...

Too doggone funny! (ha, moan).

Charles Gramlich said...

Homer, you deserve more appreciation. I'm sure the Queen doesn't really understand how much you do for her. Perhaps you should go on strike.

Homer The Palace Dog said...

CatSpeed - Have you met Persian Patticakes, the Queen's prissy cat? She's even more annoying than the Queen! I hate her too!

I'm so glad I go this chance to say what's really on my mind aboutg Her Royal Pain In Blog Butt....

Thanks for the chew toy! I'll give it to the Queen. She'll be so impressed.

Home The Palace Idiot said...

Wendy - Curlers, yes. And they're yellow. Why she needs curlers in that mop of a head of hers I'll never know..and yet, she subjects me to the ugly things on occasion.

A prize for MOI?

Oh. It's for her. Yeah yeah...always a bridesmaid, never a bride.

Woof woof you! You're kinda cute!
Are you single?

Homer ~ King Of The Castle said...

Bud - I knew you would see things my way. Finally, a person who's actually seen the damn curlers. It's atrocious!!

Let's plan a revolt while she's away!

Anonymous said...

Doesn't anybody care about the Queen?!!

Home The Palace Stud said...

Dawn - Be here at 8, Babe. We'll party like it's 2009.

Mimi Lenox said...

Mark - DogGONE is the operative word. I'm appalled at this show of mutiny. Aren't you?

Mark? Mark?....MARKK!?
No. Not you too.

Mimi Lenox said...

I heard that Charles....

The Gal Herself said...

Homer, I think you exaggerate! Surely you could at least dog paddle around the moat! (Psst! Where does Your Lady keep the good stuff? You know, the serious caffeine and the potent hootch. Have you found it yet?)

Bond said...

pssst I have pictures...taken from the woods behind the palace...if she locks you in the dungeon, I also have the master plans and can break you out in a day...

Linda said...

Ya know, Homer, you should be more grateful to your Queen - she doesn't have to let you have a cell phone! Seriously, some pets are just never satisfied!

Be glad you live in a castle and not the local pound and stop whining or you may be replaced for a Palace Cat!

Homer The Palace Hostess with the Mostess said...

Gal - She took the potent stuff with her. Drats! Can you bring a keg to the party?

Mimi Lenox said...

Vinnny - Traitor!!!!

bundle-o-contradictions said...

Homer-Dogs do take the worst of everything, don't they? I would suggest Her Highness hire a butler to relieve all of your tasks, but you take awfully good care of her. Seven sends kisses your way for that.

Mimi-Where's the Queen? What could possibly be more important than blogging????

Jean-Luc Picard said...

Spilling the beans, Homer? You know Mimi might go in a huff when she sees that.

Desert Songbird said...

I TOTALLY believe the Her Majesty would be asked to be an Idol judge.

Bond said...

hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe

huh? what?

Tarheel Ramblings said...

Homer, do me a favor and make sure the lock is still on the door to the Royal Winery. It's almost sounding like a certain person of royal bearing has been hitting the fruit of the vine a bit more than usual.

By the way, Princess Maggie the Wonder Dog says to tell you hello.

Mimi Lenox said...

Autumn - What could possibly be more important than blogging? Hmmmmmm????

Homer The Insolent Servant said...

Jean-luc - I smothered her with dog kisses when she popped in this afternoon and she's off again! It's party time!

Homer said...

Songbird - She paid you to say that, didn't she....

Homer The Palace Party Dog said...

Sir Lee - Does Maggie the Wonder Dog wear pencil skirts? Is she single? Just askin......

Hiccup.

bundleocontradictions said...

Well, Mimi, when you put it like that, my mind goes to some pretty interesting places. Unbloggable places, you might say. Um, I think I answered my own question...

Tarheel Rambler said...

No pencil skirts, Homer, but she is single.

Dawn (Twisted Sister) said...

Thanks Homer.... you left me standing at the palace gate. Typical. Just typical.

Travis said...

Did Homer put the Santa hat on the veeery skeery orangy dungeon picture? Because it doesn't seem nearly as skeery as it normally does with the Santa hat.

You know, it's complete and total chaos when you go AWOL dear.

Mimi Lenox said...

Autumn - Unbloggable sounds heavenly....

Homer aka Romeo Dog said...

Sir Lee - Tell Maggie I'd like to exchange dating profiles, K? I'm really lonely here in the Castle with Her Highness The Pain.

Homer The Lover said...

Dawn you little cutie - My humble apologies., Queen locked me out for the night. She's really upset with moi. Can't imagine why.

Can we reschedule? I've never dated a Newfie before! Do you have chew toys at your place? Cake? There are no Queens in Newfoundland....right?

Just checkin...

Mimi Lenox said...

Travis - That dog wreaked utter and total pademonium while I was away. He is sooo in hot water.
Heating up the moat.....

Ricardo said...

Homer I hope to see more contributions from you. this was excellent.

Julie said...

Oh my! Homer you are in such big trouble!

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